The Power of Touch

I remember us saying we'd post what we wrote for Dr Cook on our blogs, and I just finished up mine. I decided to write a found poem using her tweets. She introduced me to both twitter and found poetry so I thought it fitting to try to do something with that.

Power of Touch

By Joey Bonaldi

For Dr. Cook

Holding on tight

To the narrative

At her core:

There’s a metaphor

for everything.

Fall asleep, take a walk

In the clouding

Mercury-logic of reality,

of memoir.

Meet a new day

Hold on to the memory

Hold on to her life.

The power of touch,

That’s her narrative,

That’s her core

Hold on tight.

High school reflection

My biggest fear going into the high school setting was that the students wouldn’t respond well to my presence there. I worried that they wouldn’t be engaged, that they’d lack energy. When I got there a lot of my fears seemed to come to fruition, but looking back I wonder if what I saw wasn’t simply painted by my expectations.

                I’ve heard from other students that the divorce from your first placement always makes you look at the new placement with tampered eyes. I left the high energy world of middle school to something more laid back. I’m willing to admit the shock of change got the better of me for the first half of this placement. It made me really think about expectations and how they can interfere with how you actually perceive reality. I think I’m starting to understand that engagement is not just hands jumping into the air, and laughter, and smiles. Engagement can be a lot more mellow and harder to see. When I worked with those kids they seemed to enjoy the book, they responded to my questions after some probing, and when given tasks they performed them to their abilities.

                Middle school taught me patience, I had to learn to calm them down and keep my cool, and high school taught me patience in a different way. With high school I had to sit back and let them come to their answers on their own whereas I felt like middle school students genuinely wanted to have an answer as quickly as possible. High school students seemed to pull back more and see what the right answer is. This was particularly hard for me because I had to actively fight that impulse to just give them the answer. I hated those long silences, and I’m glad that I managed to keep myself from giving them answer when the silence got to be too long.

                To change gears a little bit another thing that I found to be beneficial for learning was that my cooperating teacher took one of the mini lessons Cindy and I did and taught it herself. It was a great way to see how our lesson looked on the outside so we could study what we did right and wrong. There were instances where I felt like we modeled well, and then likewise modeled poorly, and we got to see where we could improve. While yes I probably won’t do that specific lesson again, I would definitely do a variation on it, and seeing an experienced teacher give her take on it was eye opening.

                Over all I’m happy I went to the school I did. I’m definitely going to miss it, even with the weird national anthem video they play before the pledge of allegiance. It was a school that took pride in its students and had high expectations. By the end I was proud of the connections I made with my temporary students and look forward to spending time in a classroom a lot longer. 

High school week 3

Week three ended with me making an honest attempt to solve a lot of the problems I had from week 2 and I’m honestly really happy with the outcomes of most of it. For starters the power of looking at the floor while walking through the halls has led to complete avoidance of that creepy teacher that I don’t like. On a serious note though I really am starting to feel like I’m making progress their and that I’m being useful and productive

                Part of it came from actually taking initiative, along with Cindy of course, we started forming our own lessons when we couldn’t see them organically coming up in class which ended up working to our favor. We handled a few of the things that the teacher would do, like creating and going over the writer’s notebook prompts, but we also made our own mini lessons. The biggest one was that we had them reflect on parts of the book they’re reading to create their own small one panel comic to explain some way they relate to the main character. This ended up being a good idea because it is something we are going to carry over to one of our whole lessons so it’s good that we brought this into the classroom once to get them accustomed to it.

                The students seemed to respond well to our mini lessons. I mean it was still a struggle to get them to talk but we ended up pushing them towards an interesting discussion about bullying and why people don’t want to get involved in helping those in need. I was happy with how that (the writer’s notebook went) and the mini comic as well. Honestly I would have liked to have had the students share and talk more during that but I’m starting to realize you have to take the little victories. Not everyone shared, but some did, and that’s good. We collected and graded their work and I could tell that they understood what needed to be done and most students executed the assignment well. So while I didn’t have an energetic group of kids I did have students who followed the instructions and did what I asked them, and that’s awesome!

                I think looking forward I want to be less concerned with what I don’t have and try harder to work with what I do. I’m not saying I won’t try and get my students to be outgoing or anything, but the important thing is that they learn. It’s difficult though, standing up there and listening to the quiet of the classroom. Patience is another thing I have to work on. I know if I just wait them out eventually one of them will speak and answer the prompt, but after a while the wait becomes uncomfortable.

                Over all I think I’m making some solid progress their and I’m excited, but mostly nervous, to teach my lessons. Me and Cindy have a game plan and we know what we want from our students so I’m hopeful that it’ll all end well. 

Hs Week 2

Week 2

                This week was strange for me and all throughout this week I’ve been debating with myself whether I wanted to discuss the content of the classes or some things I’ve learned about myself as a person that may come into play when I am a teacher. I’ll write about both as I think they are both important but I’ll start with the latter of the two options.

                So going into school this week me and Cindy had a chance to mingle with some of the other teachers. Some of them were awesome, some not so much. I wouldn’t begin to say anything about any of their teaching performances, I haven’t seen them in action and even if I did let’s face it I’m so low on the totem pole it would be asinine to make any sort of negative judgments. What I will say is I met one teacher who I thought was a genuinely great guy who made an effort to make me and Cindy feel welcome in this school. We saw him teach our cooperating teachers class, as she had to attend a student teacher meeting, and honestly I can’t speak more highly of this man. The way he walked into a classroom that he had not established a community in and engaged the students was incredible. I think that speaks miles to his skills as an educator and as someone who makes a point of knowing not only his students, but also the students of his school.

                There was another teacher who was, unfortunately, slightly weird/inappropriate towards me and Cindy. I will not say much about him other than that he honestly made me feel uncomfortable to be around. It is what it is and the good of this week largely outweighed the bad.

                That being said I happened upon the school early enough to have to be part of the pledge of allegiance. I’m not wholly against the concept of it, but I myself don’t feel comfortable taking part in it. It got me thinking about my place in the school system and what it will be like when I run my own classroom. I felt I had to take part in it during my stay in someone else’s class, I don’t want to make waves, but in my own classroom I don’t want to have to do it. That got me thinking about the nature of it. Am I there to set a good example? I mean partly the reason I went ahead with it while I’m a guest in someone’s class room is because I feel I have to set an example for the actions the teacher/school want performed. That being said I myself don’t believe in it and, if I’m going to speak honesty, find the idea of watching a bunch of children recite something in unison kind of creepy. I don’t think I have an answer to any of these questions, but it is something to consider when I’m planning out what school community I want to be a part of when I’m looking for potential jobs.

                Well that’s probably enough heavy discussions for one blog post. Time for what I saw in the classrooms. So the train of progress seems to be moving pretty steadily. I’m still not sure where I can find my openings to become a larger part of the classroom dynamic, but I’ve been more motivated to look. We have the two classrooms that we will be focusing on. They’re reading The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian, which is great, I love that book. We’re still formulating ideas as to what we want to teach with them. I’m been thinking of a few ideas, something involving memoir and recap. I’m not sure though. Right now I’m starting to consider what I want them to get out of this book, during this lesson, and that is proving an interesting challenge. The book is largely about relationships and what they mean, how they are different, but it is also about memoir in some ways. This class is primarily focuses on writing so I’d like to focus the lesson around that.

                The other two classes (I’m observing four but two of them are doing the same thing) are a junior level class and a senior level class. I witnessed some great mediation of what could have ended up being an incident in the junior class. One student had a moment where she could potentially have had an episode in class. The teacher expertly handled the situation by removing her from the class (a negative stimulation) and talking to her one on one. The students were mature enough to keep working while the teacher talked with her and gave her some alone time to mellow out and return to class. Sometimes I get anxious and think that all time has to be strictly about learning and this was important for me to see. That student would have learned nothing in that class, in my opinion, in that state she was in. Sometimes facilitating learning is just as important, if not more important, that the actual learning. You have to build a bridge to education otherwise most of the content will end up drowning in the river along the way.

                I spoke briefly about how I am in two classes that are doing the same content. It is still crazy to me how differently they behave. One class has such low energy, but have no behavioral issues. The teacher tells them to do something and they do it, no questions. The other is livelier, but it is mostly to goof off. A lot of the students seem like their primary interest is looking good, or being a class clown and disruptive, but they seem like good kids for the most part.

                I guess my biggest concern is I want to be a bigger part of the classroom. This week the students should be starting to write more. I think that is the opening I’m looking for. 

High school week 1

Week 1

                Looking back at the last two days I’m not sure what stood out to me exactly. When I entered the school for the first time in over a year (I had observed and taught a few lessons in this school before) I was struck by the size difference between this school and the middle school down the street. The halls were huge and clean and every corner was plastered with their school mission statement. I turned the corner and in a widened space there was a large amount of student made art, I was impressed by the schools devotion to its students, but also a little intimidated by its size.

                When I got to the classrooms, however, a different reality sunk in. While the school itself was huge the classes were incredibly small. I wonder if anyone else noticed this with their first week experience. Aside from the senior class that we observed (which was roughly twenty students) I counted an average of nine or so students in the three other classes. I was shocked, it seemed so small. In middle school we had a solid twenty or so students in each class, but now it seems we’ll be lucky to get half of that. I’m not saying this is a bad thing, truth is I don’t know what it’ll end up being till I’ve dipped my feet in a bit more.

                Another thing I noticed was the lack of energy in the room. With so small a class I’d think the students would be talking and generally showing signs of being in a community. I want to make note that I don’t think this is the fault of the teacher but I think the students just don’t seem to have the energy to talk. It’s like the life has been drained out of them. I’m a bit worried about teaching them because it seems like the biggest struggle will be actually getting them to talk. They don’t seem to have any behavior issues, albeit I only observed the class twice, so that is an advantage I guess. I wonder if there is anything I can do to charge them up. In middle school the kids had too much energy and me and Danielle had to use mediation in order to get them to calm down and focus. What could I do to get the opposite effect out of these students? How can I wake them up?

                That’s not to say all the students are like that. The seniors seem to be the exception to all my observations but I won’t be teaching them. They are starting their senior project prep and the teacher said she’d rather work with them herself to make sure they’re on the right track. I totally get that, this school is a model for senior project and I wouldn’t think to step in on that. It would be far more valuable to observe how this school runs it so I can learn to do it myself one day. 

Middle School Reflection

                As I began thinking about this assignment the first thing I thought about what: what did I think before I started middle school? To be honest the answer was something along the lines of let me just get through this. I had no interest in teaching middle school and I had no interest in middle school students. I thought surely they must be hormone charged rascals that I’d have to baby sit rather than teach. In short I was wrong.

                After teaching my two lessons I learned a few things about myself as a teacher and them as an age group. I won’t try and convince you that everything went perfecting, it didn't. I was always afraid of failing or ruining my lessons or any other uncertainty that comes with teaching, but I think I’m starting to get over that a bit. I’m finally starting to accept that I’m a new teacher and therefore teaching should be new to me, meaning I don’t have to be perfect I just have to try and learn.

                The sixth grade lesson went pretty well, though we ended up finishing our primary lesson a lot earlier than expected. This turned out not to be that big of a deal, instead we just went on to the content we planned for the next day and everything went smoothly.

                Seventh grade was a bit harder. They were a less focused and more apt to act out. I've noticed they are a lot more energetic and tend to need management more, and on top of that the lesson was split by a lunch. Normally this would get to me but I realized that sometimes you just have to step back, take a breath, and check out your variables. Sure they were unfocused, sure lunch would get in the way, sure there was a group of kids that just wouldn't stop talking no matter how many times I asked them to stop. These are problems, but problems don’t go away by ignoring them. After the 8^th time the group of kids ignored my request to stop talking I finally had to scold them. I told them if they talked one more time I’d separate them. It worked, for the most part. It was weird, I don’t really see myself as that kind of person, I’m very low key and easy going, but I’m honestly proud of myself for taking initiative and doing something like that. Last semester I would never have scolded a kid. This is real progress!

                The other problems worked themselves out as best as we could work them. The students had too much energy so we made them rest for five minutes with the lights off. We did that with our sixth graders and it seemed to work well. It worked okay with the seventh graders but they didn’t take it as seriously. Lunch proved to actually be helpful because we reworked a lot of our lesson during the twenty minute gap.

                Over all I had a pleasant experience teaching in middle school. Upon reflection I have to say I wouldn't mind working in this kind of setting and even working with younger students. My only concern is I believe there is a balance with teaching. The younger the student is the more engaged they seem to be which is great but you can’t go as far with the content and it is definitely more management. With older students you have the opposite. It seems that it’s much harder to engage them in the lesson but I find I don’t have to manage their behavior as much and I can go further with the content. It’s a tricky balance but I have to say these last four weeks have shown me that I can actually enjoy myself teaching in a middle school setting. I really enjoyed working with the sixth graders and I've actually been considering getting elementary Ed certified sometime down the line. I’m not sure yet but it is definitely a possibility. 

week 3

Week 3

                I apologize for the lateness of this post. Week three was interesting. Two important things happened during this week. I’ll start of by saying that this was during spring break so I found myself there less than we normally would.

                The first thing was that the students performed their debate. One thing I loved about our cooperating teacher is that she really let us control a lot of the unit planning while we are here. She asked us specifically what we’d like to see the students do and said as long as it fit in the curriculum (this quarter they’re on developing argumentative skills) then she was perfectly happy letting us have a say in the design of the class. This was really cool, I think I can speak for both myself and Danielle when I say it was really empowering to have an actual say in what the students got to do in class. We both really wanted to see them do a debate (both our 6^th and 7^th graders) and so we really pushed for that to happen.

                Seeing the debate happen was something else. Our cooperating teacher requires her students to dress up for them as she put it “They have to dress up for sports why shouldn’t they be expected to do in English class too” which I totally get. It’s a good way to give the kids the opportunity to act professional, something they need a few times in their young lives. That being said I have to say nothing is cuter than seeing a group of 6^th graders dressed up in ties and vests and debating like lawyers. They had a lot of fun with it and they seemed engaged, if not a bit too focused on minute details of the debate.

                That being said it was so awesome to see something we helped design come into being. I was so proud when I watched them debate. I kept thinking this is so cool! We helped make this! I hope feelings like this last because that was definitely a rewarding experience.

                Something else that happened that I thgout was worth noting was that I got to help one of the special ed teachers input parc ( or maybe it was kneecap) data during cpt (common practice time). It was really interesting to learn about that stuff. I recognized some of the names on the list as some of our students (that’s another thing that was so cool, I actually started remembering all their names. That and referring to them as ‘my students’ was awesome) and it was interesting to see their performance in class and their scores on the tests. Not all of them matched the effort I saw in the students and even still I found myself feeling bad when I saw some students with low grades, even the ones I didn’t know, mostly I think because of how little I agree with the tests anyway. It was interesting to see it on the other side though, I’m so used to only hearing people bash standardized testing it was nice to actually get to hold some data in my hand from it and realize it was real and not just this ghoulish thing people yell about.